today ... did nothing much ..

school .. study ... sleepy ... eat ... dance ... homework ...

after school ... meet friend ... slack ...

home ... play game ... eat ... facebook then cry ...

haha .. no mood already ..

i go slash myself ... shh .. don't tell anyone ..

... erom yna mih tsurt tonnac i ...
... yug diputs a tahw ...
... mih yb deloof saw i sseug i ...
... mih oot ylno tuo gniwohs ma i taht doolb ym ees dluoc eh hsiw i ...
... tol a mih evol yllaer i taht wohs oot ...

find out the meaning ur self .. i dont wanna talk ..

Here are some pictures i did ... using computer ... sorry if the pictures are ugly .. i was bored .. FOR YOUR INFO !! I did not copy !! its my own imagination .. -.- it just depends on my mood ..



... Angel Naked ...



... Desire to Kill ...



... Couple ...




... Shattered Rose ...

the first picture ... i lazy to make clothes ... so i cover it with cloth .. haha
the second picture ... i was angry ... so i draw something that kills people ..
the third picture ... i was bored .. i am not horny ..
the last picture ... my shattered rose that is covered with black and red strings that is about to shatter it apart ..

do comment .. please recommand me some stuff .. then i will draw ... ANYTHING .. i will try my est to draw ..

wow .. i am so bored like crazy !!! i went to "try" to play genesis AD .. then ..got bored .. after that i went to play high street 5 .. to train my character ... then i go vote for my rydah ... to get cash ... and now i am watching anime ... gosh .. bored !

tomorrow got school .... and i am so stress !! because ..... monday i got 2 period of MT .. what the FISH !! and its like the last period ..

then .. tuesday ... i got cca and another period of dancing .... forthe YOG thingy ... damm .. Kok Yong is inside it . -.- see him dance make me laugh .. :x then thursday .. i won't go for my chinese dance ... as i need to go for this yog thingy ... LOL ! again .. see kok yong .. -.- what the hell ~! then friday i got cca .... stresssssssssssssssssssssssssss goshh !

i am still annoyed and irritated because of yesterday . haizzz !!!

i still can't believe that nadhirah is still with the 27 years old guy .. in indonesia ... sadly .. he went into hospital yesterday .. because he had some accident ... then today .. nadhirah tell me that he is save ... and fine ... i was like ... NO COMMENT ... after that she start to tell me that she felt like breaking up with him ... for his on sake ... i was like ...
- yesterday keep crying to me .. saying that she miss him .. she scared anything happen to him .. she love him alot ..

and now she telling me that she wants to break up .. then i was like ... " he work SO hard to marry you, you know ! I think he will do anything to have you back .. Not all guys will do that you know ... you are lucky u have that kind of guy ( even though he is older than you by 12 years .. ) "

then she was like ... " i guess you are right .. ok .. i never get to break up with him "

but 3 days ago .. she told me .. that she is with another guy who live in malaysia ... and she told me " i don't know about the indonesia guy . he never reply me "

i was like ... " so it means u have 2 guys ? "
she " yeah .. "
i " why on earth u stead with 2 guys ? "
she " i don't know "

then a few minutes later ( 30 minutes ) the indonesia guy online ... say that he missed her a lot .. and he does not mind if she is with another guy .. but he will always love her .. he also said that he was busy, so he never get to reply her ..

so i asked her " so how ? you are still with the malaysia guy you know "
she " i don't know what to do ): "
i " then how about Imran( another guy in singapore ) ?? "
she " he say he wants me so badly "
i " then ? "
she " another one is Rafiqul ( another guy in singapore ) .. he have girlfriend already .. but he tell me that he miss me .. "
i " and you want to believe Imran and Rafiqul ? "
she " i don't know ! i am still inlove with Rafiqul "
i " but you are with the Indonesia guy ! you love who most ? "
she " i don't know . i still love Rafiqul .. "
i " but you just now say u love the indonesia guy "
she " i don't know la .. let Rafiqul off . he already got girlfriend . "
i " yeahh .. glad u know .. "

ENDS HERE

that time she told me that she do not have any MSN ... end up she have msn .... what the fishh !!! i asked her since when she have ... she say " ada la ( got la ) " that word was like she saying ... i have it a long time ago ... so yeahh !

i had no idea ... but i felt that she is best to go to MALAYSIA .. where her fake father is throwing her into ... maybe she will be more discipline ..

( for you info .. i am talking about nadhirah .. because ... i had no idea why ... things just pop out of my head .. maybe because i hate her .. a lot ... because of her attitude ... )

i am still changing my blog name ... please ask or my new address .. latest is by this coming wednesday .. :D

sms me .. or msn me ... or leave a msg in my tag box ..

bored like crazy ..... now what time already ... JUST when my dad just got in ..... he start to argue with me ... -.- keep telling me about what i promised him ... i was like " and the promise i never even did it ! " then he was like .. giving a dam face to me .. i was so pissed like crazy siaaa ..... then he say i rude to him ... he not my father ... he not this and that ... i was so pissed off ...

the promise he said was ... ( i will give u new laptop if u promise me ..

- no boyfriend
- no non sense

just a few minutes ago .. i was talking to a FRIEND ... a MALE FRIEND .. then he come inside my room ... then gimme the kind of face ... then he scold me like crazy .... haizz .. i don't understand my dad at all ...

that time say i can get boyfriend when i'm 15 ... then after a while he say i can get bf when i'm 18 .. then he say 20 .. then he say after i finish university ...... damm laaa .. i fking pissed off with what my dad say ..... as if i'm at fault ... he won't ever stop and let me off ..... ARGHHHH !!! i wish i could just ..... have a peaceful life .. without any disturbance !!

heyy .. sorry i never update my blog !!! i am tired .. haha .. lets start a fresh ~

12 June

- Went to Malaysia for the JOM Adventure Camp
- Reach Terrenganu and took a boat to check into Resort ( the resort was like ..... a Kampong place .. to make it simple .. its a 0 Star .. )
- Went hiking up the mountain to find an area to swim

13 June

- Woke up, bad breakfast
- hiking up the mountain to a waterfall area to swim ~
- back to the Resort, had our lunch and continue on to make a Bamboo Rafting .. ( my raft was our new technology ... at can be fold .. muahahaha )
- at night, managed to make new friends .... 1 teenage boy, same age ... 1 primary 6 boy, taler then me .. dammit ! both of them are tall ..lol -.-

14 June

- had our breakast
- check out of Resort, took the boat back to the bus ...
- traveled not more then 3 hours .
- took another boat to an Island ... Resort ..
- check in Resort and sleep .. ( the resort was like a 3 star resort .. i sleep because of the boat, i was about to vomit )
- at night, went to do squid fishing ( we never caught any squid ... cause our boat .. after 10 minutes .. everyone cannot stand it ... cause everyone dizzy .. and want to vomit already .. i also .. haha )

15 Jue

- breakfest
- went hiking again ... ( so many mosqitoes !!! donating our blood to them .. damm ! )
- stop in one warm and cooling water side ...
- went back to the resort .. had our lunch ...
- had korake ..
- made new friends .. ( 2 girls .... 1 is priamry 6, the other one is primary 4 or 3 .. and 1 ITE guy ... )
- back in our room ... start pakcing up ...

16 june

- had breakfast
- check out and took a boat back to our bus ..
- traveled not more then 2 hours
- checked into Resort ( no boat needed this is 5 star ... yay )
- Rest and lunch ... then took a stroll down to shop .. got lots of stuff ... but sadly .. i lost the items i bought for everyone -.-

17 jue

- had breakfast
- got ready to go back home, to singapore ...
- took a bus to the airport in terrengannu ... not very long to reach there ..
- took an airoplane called, Firefly ... ( its the budget Terminal's airoplane ... )
- in the airoplane made friend with another guy ... ( had no idea how old is he ... but he say he is older than me )
- got people's contact numbers .... like .... 5 ???? ( all my new friend .... accept for this guy ^ )
- at night, online MSN and add friends ... and chat with Fiasarah .. planning on watching movie ...

------------------

i had fun ... lots of fun ! not because i donated my blood to the mosqitoes .. LOL !! there is no way i will give away my blood to Leaches .... or whatever insects in that forest !

-----------------

18 june

- on computer .. check emails and facebook ...
- got ready at 12pm ...
- went out to Ang Mo Kio, Jubilee Entertainment complex at 2.40pm to watch movie with Faisarah ... ( Me, Faisarah, my younger brother, and her younger brother )
- Reach the area at 3.20PM ... bought tickets ... and popcorns and drinks ...
- 4PM watch movie The Karate Kid ..
- 6.30PM got out of the cienma .... me and Faisarah was still ... touched ... and still crying ... Lol .. >.<
- reached Woodlands at 7PM .. and bought McDonald for my family...
- reached home at 7.30PM ..

19 June ( today )

- on computer ... check MSN, Facebook and emails ...
- help dad fix some stuff ..
- scream out loud ... because ... my dad scared me with the Crabs he was about to cook ...
- eat lunch ...


Now its 1:35PM .... i am going to end here .. xD

xoxo (:

today ... had my trainings .... tired ... my body is cram .. omg ... when is this pain going to wear off ! and i'm so tired ... i think my body is going to collapse .. haha .. ohh well ... i just love dancing that's all (:

[ sorry guys can't go to the picnic and bbq ): ]

now ... hmmm .... i was wondering .... " will he ever keep his promise " .. this thoughts keep running around my mind ... i wonder if he is telling the truth .. i just don't want to end up being the stupid one trusting him ... yeahh ? i mean like ... is he seriously wanting to meet me ? and me myself eagerly wanting to get the prepaid card just because of him . this is natural for a girl .. yeahh ??? wondering if they could ever trust a guy ? just because they trust the person they love so much ... it may be possible that i am becoming love drunk .. i'm so love drunk ... and i just admitted it .. -.- can't stand it .. lets get back to what i meant ..... trusting guys ... i just want to know if he is even telling the truth ... but how ? not all guys can keep their secrets ... right ? If i were to trust him .. i wonder will he keep my trust, standard . i really want to 'jumpa' him ... but ... will he even look forward to seeing me ? i had no idea if i could ever trust a guy ... i don't know what to say ...

ANYWAYS (: i am going to change web address soon :D feel free to ask me what is my web address ... it will be written in my msn .. o.o

tag me (:

hmm .. lets see ... Today i have my Modern Dance training ... and NZ NE Dance lessons ..

Modern Dance ...
-My body is already aching .... PAIN !!!
-I got selected to be in the NorthZone National Education School Competition
- Did Ballet .... WORK OUT ..

NZ NE Dance Lessons ... ( actually i had no idea what is it called .. haha )
-Dance dance dance
-Formation

you seeeeeeeee ......

NorthZone National Education Performance ....... then got ...... NorthZone National Education Competition ..... SOOOOO MANY DANCE STEPSS ..! STRESSSSSSSSSSS ! >.<

Then must remember the Intermediate Chinese dance, dance steps ... then ... sooner or later need practice on the SYF 2011 dance .. -.- stresssssssssssssssss

SAD THING IS !!! I did not go for the BBQ ): with all the 33 and a few 34 .. SAD !!!!! ): Saw their photos ... and i was like .. " they had so much fun there ..." haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ! i got noooooo comment .. -.- sooooo unfair .. >.<

anyways .. end here ..

xoxo

hey hey .. sorry i never update my blog for the pass few days ...

wanted to update my blog yesterday ... but my aunt used my REAL mother laptop .. so i cannot use ... my laptop no connection ... SAD !!!! >< so ... now i have to rush ... on what happen the last few days .. and today ...

Wednesday ( 2 June )

Today i felt very happy inside ... but i felt very emo when i look at people .. i had NO idea why ... Maybe it was what happen on Tuesday .. which was yesterday ... NIGHT ... hmm ... it was really a shock that i have never notice .. and i was tooo stupid ... i was thinking .. " why didn't i did that in the first place ?? instead of crying my heart out " hmm ... Tuesday night ... i think i know why ... is it because of "that person" ..? or was i wrong ?? maybe yes ... maybe no ...

yang " that person " ialah lelaki yang tinggal di kedah ... kalau korang tahu .. o.o dia sms aku ... terperanjat aku ... aiyaaa !!! sangat rindu dia ... dia rindu aku pulak ... dia jangan tipu sudah .... bukan apa .. kita dua bersama ... hahaha .. xDDD

sorry if i type that in Malay ..... want to know .. i try to say it to you face to face ... or else don't force ... cause it isn't important .. okiie ? good .. don't ask .. rawrr !! :P

alamak ... sangat rindu dia sia ... -.- tak blh tahan ...!!!! AHHHHH !!!!!! LOL !!

Thursday ( 3 June )

i came back home from school around 4.30pm .... my REAL mother asked me if we want to come over her place .. and i was like .. " sure, why not " ... so she asked me to inform my dad .. and we were like ..... arguing ....... ABOUT to argue ... haizzz ... at times i don't understand why we have to fight over small stuff ... just because i want to go over my REAL mother place ... is it wrong for me to go there ?

I don't mind if he wants to send me over ... i don't mind if he want me to go by myself when he is not free .. but .... he was like .. nagging at me all of a sudden ... as if i would do something bad ... like run away from home .. or so ...

i don't understand what is going on around here ... why am i put in between and being blamed and wrong ..? is it wrong for me to say i want to go over my mom place .....???!!! ( i know i am repeating it ... )

YES, i have school the next day ... i know he have work in the morning the next day tooo ... he can just let me go myself ...

i can't end up becoming BLURR sotong when i grow up and get a job ... i mean, there is a time when ... a parents need to let their child learn how to go a place by themselves ... am i wrong ??
Yes, i know they are worried ... for the children ... but don't they ever think it would be more difficult for them to understand when they get older ?

i feel like i would end up becoming a shy shy ... scary cat girl .... never mind that ... i understand my dad's feeling ... i kept thinking that .. " he doesn't let me go to my mother house .." when he say something .. he sound like it ... maybe he did not noticed it ...
TOTALLY !! i am not angry that my dad say those things to me ... i won't get hurt about it ... cause ... i myself had NO idea what to say and do ... when i talk back .. he say i am becoming rude .... to him ... never mind ... i don't wanna go further on this things .... its gonna be more annoying and irritating if i continue on ...

( NOTE : I am not saying my dad is evil ... i just don't get what am i to them ... )

Friday ( 4 June )

i am now in my REAL mother house .. and i am playing Wii ... xDD !!! so funnn !!! :D can't use my laptop ... dammit .. >< no Internet .... sad !! ): The Internet is spoil ... it says .. Limited or no connectivity ... lol -.- grr .. nevermind ...

TODAY ( 5 June )

FINALLY CAN USE MY REAL MOTHER LAPTOP !!! (: now updating my blog .... and waiting for SOMEONE to answer my question that i wrote in facebook ( Gmail account ) .... hahahaha (:

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any on who does not GET it at all .. do ask me IN PERSON ... i would only say stuff that is important ... those that are not important .. i won't reply back .. :P

my fake ( sister/brother ) i will tell ...
my real ( sister/brother/cousin ) i will tell ...
( Friends/besty ) i won't tell ... only trust worthy ...
THE REST DEPENDS ON MY MOOD ....!!! (:

xoxo,
its just me !! :P

ok ... lets start with my post .. LOL ! Ok ... Saturday and Sunday .. nothing happen at all ... Hooray its June . Hope its not a tiring day or me/us . ok .. since its the 1st June ... What happen going to happen in June is ...

- Modern Dance training ( 1 week [ 2nd week ] )
- Chinese Intermediate Dance ( 2 days [ 1st week ] )
- NorthZone National Education Performance Training Sessions ( 1st, 2nd, 4th, 5th week )
- JOM Adventure Camp ( 6 days [ 3rd week ] )

yes ... its all about dance .. haha (: and yes, it is going to be a tiring day for me ... not day ... opppss ... month ... and JOM Adventure Camp .. (: ( FYI : JOM Adventure Camp is not a school event . It is outside activity event ) .. YES ! It will be a tiring day ! And the same thing will happen for the whole of the 1st, 2nd, 4th, 5th weeks ..! only the Camp is another story ... hahaha (:

besides all this .. How am i ? .... Well, i can say that i am feeling an Average mood today . Lol .... I am feeling pissed, hate, love, hurt, broke, pain, happy, excited, tired, etc. .... haha ... that's why its Average .. lol ... To push it more easier to understand, it is just a " Fine " if i would to reply the question .. (:

Yes, i have new pictures . No, i did not edit . Yes, it is me . No, its not anyone else . Yes, I'm half Chinese . LOL !! I am so random (:

i guess that is all .. nothing much to type anyways (:

xoxo :P